The Golden Ass

I saw this image on Facebook a couple weeks ago. It was intended by a young man to be a silly meme in support of gun ownership. I'd say there's a lot there that he didn't necessarily intend or see. I'd further say that he unwittingly revealed precisely the problem, something hidden underneath our typical debates around guns, gender, and sexuality. So, said problem goes WAY further than guns. What this says isn't disconnected from cultural antagonisms around gender and sexuality.

The real issue is that both our images of male identity and of the power of gun possession function as idols in our world (which obviously aren't so disconnected from each other). This isn't a good case for either guns or manliness. Rather, this is how we know our image of manhood - and our relationships with women and with one another - are broken.

What do I mean by that? Put a gun in my hand, and it changes my image of who I am. This meme speaks to exactly what that means for us, quite viscerally.

This image of manhood is not nurturing, caring, "emotional," or anything else we typically ascribe to the image of woman. It's aggressive, adventurous, powerful, determined, etc.

This presents a false image of manhood that puts undo pressures on (all) men and creates undo antagonisms with and against women / femaleness, and men who don't care to fit the bill...

It's precisely why we have a lot of the antagonisms we have. (For example, the whole LGTBQ debate or the gendered bathroom debate). The LGTBQ debate isn't so separate from a little boy showing emotion and being screamed at, "Don't be a little girl!" The image of manhood tied to guns is very different from the image of a woman traumatized by rape with a gun in her hand.

So, this false image of manhood is also why we have tons of men who have no idea what it means to be or have a father or who have terrible relationships with their fathers - not to mention with women! Because the image of manhood that was presented to us - or more likely violently forced upon us ("You better quit crying, before I give you something to cry about!") - was damaging, hurtful, and caused broken relationships (the cloud of witnesses to this casts far too large of a shadow). And, deep down, we know this.

These images of male and female - particularly defined in antagonism with one another ("You better wipe those tears off your face, boy!") - simply aren't natural and/or weren't always the case.

*The above was slightly edited for blog form and was posted recently HERE on Facebook.